muggle biology can be fun
by yacool15
Summary: It's the trio's seventh year at Hogwarts and Voldemort is dead so the headmaster decided to have some fun and and started a climbing class and the instrutor is none other then Professor Snape.


I don't own any of the harry potter characters.  
  
This is dedicated to Ashley who gave me the idea. She came up with the  
idea during gym when we were climbing.  
  
This is a HP/DM fic and sort of HG/SS. The seventh year class has to  
learn how to climb but first they have to master how to put a harness  
on. Professor Snape is the instructor of how to climb and put a  
harness on.  
  
"Today for your first lesson your going to learn how to put a harness on and for some of you this would be a lot easier than potions." Professor Snape said eyeing the seventh year class of all four houses.  
  
The headmaster put in a new class for the seventh years, climbing. He wanted the kids to have some fun after the final battle against Voldemort. Fortunately the only casualties were the death eaters. There was an attack at Hogwarts but thanks to Snape the school was ready for the attack. The teachers, aurors, order members and the seventh year students fought. In the end Harry, Ron and Hermione defeated Voldemort.  
  
Also Draco never walked in his father footsteps. In there sixth year Draco befriend the trio and helped to bring down the fall of Voldemort. A couple months later Harry started to have feelings for Draco but what he doesn't know is that Draco has feelings for him to.  
  
"Now first take the harness and put the side with the picture on the outside, then strap the buckle and over loop and make sure it's tight. Then do the same with the leg straps, then buckle the strap in the back after you're done with that tell me and I'll check." Snape said as he demonstrates to them.  
  
The lucky part for the female part of the class is that Snape is wearing tight black jeans but the harness makes them even more tight and a black muscle T-shirt.  
  
"Grrrrr... I can't get this, it just won't get tighter and it's falling off." Harry growled as he was still trying to get the waist buckle tight.  
  
"Here let me help " Draco said coming to help Harry.  
  
Draco came over and tightened the buckle. He moved on to the leg straps. He put his hands on the strap to tighten more.  
  
"Rrrrr... come on" Draco growled. "Having a little trouble there" Harry laughed as Draco scowled at him. He finally got that one and went to the next one, which was easier than the first one. He was about to go to buckle the back when they heard yelling and giggling.  
  
"MS.GRANGER STOP TRYING TO TOUCH MY ARSE." Snape yelled and Hermione just laughed more.  
  
"But look at it and it's not my fault you decided to bend down when I was right behind you." Hermione said innocently.  
  
"I dropped my wand Ms. Granger" Snape said but the comment just made Hermione laugh even more.  
  
"What is so funny? Ten points from Gryffindor and detention with me at 7 tonight" Snape growled.  
  
"Yes sir." Hermione answered sadly but on the inside she was screaming with joy. "Sir can you please help me though? Hermione asked.  
  
"What Ms. Granger do you need help with?" Snape asked cautiously only because Hermione Head girl never needed help before.  
  
"Well you see sir this strap wont go in and" sigh "I'm just not strong enough for this" Hermione said sweetly.  
  
"Fine Ms. Granger" he said while getting down on his knees to help her. "Grrr....get in come on why won't get in this isn't suppose to be hard for me I've done this many times" came Snapes frustrated voice. It took all of the class will power to double over laughing at the sound of that.  
  
"YES GOT IT" Snape cheered. "There you go Ms. Granger now we got that finished class is dismissed and remember Ms. Granger my office tonight" Snape said.  
  
"Yes sir" Hermione said.

* * *

7 PM came too soon for the head girl. She was walking down to the dungeons when she heard a moan and a voice. "Draco I think it's stuck" "What? It can't be but it does hut ow stop moving" "Sorry"  
  
"Oh God" Hermione groaned "I've got to get out of here" She ran to the potion masters office and knocked on the door and waited for a reply.  
  
"Come in" came Snapes muffled reply. She opened the door to find Snape looking up at her from his desk. "Ms. Granger please sit" he gestured to the chair in front of his desk. Hermione walked to the chair and sat. "Now Ms. Granger I know I'm dead sexy I mean look at me no one can resist the tall, dark and mysterious but you are my student and this can't continue were you are lusting over me am I clear?" Snape said and raised a single eyebrow at her.  
  
"Yes sir" Hermione said quietly while blushing.  
  
"Now that's it and please tell Mr. Potter and Malfoy to stop that because I'm getting sick of listing to them and I really don't feel like getting up you know only because sitting a lot may keep you arse nice and firm" Snape smirked  
  
"Yes sir that wouldn't be good if you didn't because then I would have nothing to stare at during class" Hermione said smiling.  
  
Snape smiled back "Right now run along before I take points off. Good night Ms. Granger."  
  
"Good night Professor." Hermione said while closing the door.  
  
"Oh Sev are you done yet?" A young woman in her mid 20's said while coming out of the back room. She looked like Jessica Simpson but with darker hair.  
  
"Coming Amanda" Snape responded.  
  
"Good because I have the whip cream and cherries ready" Amanda said and gestured Snape to come back with her.

* * *

Ron was walking around the dungeons to find Harry. He was near the potions classrooms when he heard a noise from the left of were he's standing.  
  
"Severus the cherries and the whip cream don't belong there. You should put them more on the left." A female voice rang out.  
  
"If you would stop moving then I could do it right and hard or soft?" (A/N. Hey they could be talking about sundaes. Use your imagination.) Professor Snape asked.  
  
Ron was about to run before his virgin ears heard anything else when he heard two different voices from a different classroom.  
  
"You're doing it too hard...ow" The one voice said in pain  
  
"You're the one who said harder." the second voice said.  
  
Ron looked green and muttered under his breath "That sounds a lot like Harry. He walked to the door and opened it and saw Harry and Draco a very comfortable position.  
  
"What are you guys doing?" Ron yelled  
  
"Hey I thought we locked that door. Uh...you see we were learning more about muggle Biology. Draco stuttered.  
  
"Yeah you see the male reproductive system is easier then the female reproductive system. The penis contains cavernous tissue which fills with blood to cause the penis to stiffen and that causes an erection and then the penis goes in the..." Harry was cut off by Ron.  
  
"No stop Harry! So can I join?" Ron asked.  
  
"Uh...sure" Harry agreed  
  
"Great!" Ron said excited to learn about muggle Biology.

* * *

All done! Hope you liked it and Review PLEASE! 


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